Family Ties
by KChicago
Summary: Erin Lindsay's family and past are stories nobody knows. When tragedy strikes and she becomes the guardian of her 16 year old cousin, her whole world is turned upside down. Can Erin handle the trials and tribulations of raising a 16 year old? Some crossover with Chicago Fire characters
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I own no characters, etc from Chicago PD or Chicago Fire.

Erin Lindsay closed the door to her apartment, threw her bags down and collapsed onto the couch. It had been a demanding day at District 23. They had closed in on a heroin ring case they had been working for months, and it ended with one guy dead and Olinsky having a gun put to his head. Just another day in the life of the Intelligence Unit. She leaned her head back and allowed her eyes to close and think of the upcoming weekend. She was off Saturday, and she and Jay were going to dinner and then a get together with the Firehouse 51 crew at Molly's. It had been a demanding few weeks at work, and Erin had to admit she was more than looking forward to some relaxation and fun. She was about to drift off when her phone began ringing in her purse across the room. Little did she know that that phone call would turn her world upside down.

* * *

Erin busted through the doors of Lakeshore Medical Center and began looking wildly around the reception area, desperately looking for a sign of where to go. "Erin!" she heard her name being yelled. She looked down the hall and saw Gabby Dawson and ran towards her. "What happened?" she squeaked out as Dawson gave her a quick hug. "Accidental drug overdose we think, still not sure. There looked to be a lot of prescription bottles on her dresser. Shay noticed the picture of you two stuck in her mirror, the daughter called it in so we asked her and-" "Wait" Erin stepped back, cutting her off "Riley? Is she here?" Gabby nodded and started walking down the hall towards the waiting room.

Erin's head was reeling. She hadn't seen her cousin Marleigh in six months. The two had been close growing up. Marleigh was three years older, and Erin idolized her as children. Marleigh had gotten pregnant at 17 with her daughter Riley, was kicked out by her parents, and went to live with her boyfriend's family. She was the only member of the family Erin stayed in touch with after being taken in by Voight. Although they had drifted apart with their separate lives through the years, they still caught up whenever they got the chance. Erin knew that Marleigh didn't have it easy in recent years. She had always bounced between men and jobs. She had broken up with Riley's father soon after the birth, but he remained an active part of Riley's life until he was killed in an auto accident when she was 8. He had had a large life insurance policy, to which Riley was the sole beneficiary, and Erin knew that Marleigh had mostly provided for her daughter with that. The last time they had gotten together, Erin had suspected Marleigh might be dabbling. She had looked worn out, and mentioned some doctor visits and medications. She didn't want to press her on it at the time, and had meant to get together again soon after, but as it often does, life got in the way.

She rounded the corner after Gabby and immediately saw Riley. Erin hadn't seen her in over a year, but she recognized her instantly. She was 16 and gorgeous, with a natural tan, flowing light brown hair and the same eyes as Erin and her mother. She was biting her nails and gazing across the room when her eyes locked with Erin's. "Oh my god, Erin," she said as she stood up and Erin hurried over and wrapped her in a hug. "I'm so sorry, I came home and Mom was passed out in her bed and she looked worse than usual and I saw the pill bottles, so I called 911 and then the paramedic saw the picture of you and said she knew you and, and-, " she couldn't finish her sentence, and instead just silently sobbed into Erin's shoulder "Shhh, sweetie its okay, I'm glad they called me. " Erin stepped out of the embrace and guided Riley back into the chair she had been sitting in. As she took a seat next to her, Gabby quietly came over and said waved goodbye. Erin smiled at her and mouthed thank you, and then turned back to Riley. "What's been going on Ri?" she asked solemnly. Riley just gave her a sad look in return, "Erin, my mom is a mess. She's always drunk or strung out. I mean, she's had tendencies for years but it's been bad lately. She broke up with that asshole Brent a few months ago and it's just been downhill. I tried to help, I think she went to a meeting once or twice but it's out of control. " Riley looked away, processing the situation with her mother. Erin didn't know what to say. "You could've called me," she said softly to the younger girl. "What, and drag more people down with her? She doesn't want to be helped. And no offense Erin, but I seriously barley know you. I just know you're the only sane person I'm related to," Riley said honestly. Erin knew it was true. She had gone to all of Riley's birthday parties and events growing up, but she didn't have a strong relationship with her. They had just never made the time. She was thinking about how to respond to Riley when a Doctor approached them. "Excuse me, are you the family of Marleigh Lindsay?" Riley and Erin both nodded slowly. The Doctor took one look at Riley and then back at Erin. "I'm Dr. Lane, can I please speak to you for a moment" she he said directly to Erin, indicating that the conversation needed to be private. "Of course," Erin stood up and followed him a few steps away, out of Riley's earshot, although she could feel her staring at them. The Doctor looked pained. "Ms. Lindsay ingested a combination of sleeping pills, Xanax, and anti-depressants. There was also some barley traceable cocaine in her system. Her liver and heart were both weak from what seemed to be long-term abuse, and unfortunately couldn't handle the lethal combination. I'm sorry, but she didn't make it."

* * *

Erin could feel the color draining from her face. Marleigh was dead. She instinctively looked over at Riley, and was met with Riley's eyes staring straight back at her. One look and she knew. Riley immediately stood out and turned on her heel and ran out of the automatic doors. Erin gave the doctor a confused glance, and turned to rush out after her. She ran out of the doors and looked around, and in the distance could see Riley on a courtyard bench knees pulled to her chest. Erin slowly walked towards her, attempting to process what was happening. She sat down next to Riley and put her hand on the girl's shoulder. Two tears slowly steamed down the younger girl's mascara stained cheeks, and Erin could do nothing but run her hand through her long, lightly curled hair. Riley looked over at her "So that's it, huh? My mom's a junkie and now she's dead. God this is so messed up". Riley was still dressed in her school uniform, and suddenly looked so young and scared to Erin. She wanted so badly to comfort her, but didn't know what to say. She put her arm around her shoulder and just let her cry.

* * *

A few hours later, Erin and Riley were back at Marleigh's house. Riley had gone up to shower and pull herself together, and Erin was trying to process what her next step would be. She had nobody to call, she didn't know Marleigh's life. She had called Voight, who had told her to take all the time she needed and to let him know if she needed anything, and Halstead to let him know what was going on. While the two weren't dating, Erin felt the need to tell him what was going on, and deep down she knew she needed his comfort. She wandered into the den, and opened a small filing drawer that contained what looked like all of Marleigh's important documents. She thumbed through a couple of files, labeled taxes, Riley Immunizations, mortagage, etc. and finally got to the last one, labeled Will. She picked it up and opened it and ruffled through some papers. There was a business card for a lawyer staped to the folder. Erin detached the card and set it to the side, knowing this would be a number she needed. She scanned through the documents until her eyes caught one heading: Guardianship of Riley Olivia Lindsay: Erin Lindsay.


	2. Chapter 2

AN: For the purpose of this story, Erin lives in the South Loop neighborhood. I have no idea where she actually lives in the show!

It had been a whirlwind week for Erin. Instead of spending the previous weekend at dinner and Molly's, she had spent it putting together Marleigh's funeral

and figuring out the logistics of Riley's new normal, not to mention her own. There were no other family members to consult with, so it had been up to Erin

and a few of Marleigh's friends who had come together, although losing touch with her over the past few months, to make all arrangements. It was now the

Saturday of Labor Day weekend, and Erin felt like she was just beginning to get a grasp on things. She had successfully moved Riley into her apartment that

day, and Marleigh's friends were handling getting her house ready to sell. Erin had also been in contact with Marleigh's lawyer throughout the week, and

luckily it seemed that her affairs were mostly in good order, and transferring things to Erin's name were going smoothly. Now, her main focus was Riley. The

past week had been chaotic that they hadn't had much time to spend one on one. Erin was looking forward to being able to get her established.

"Hey sweetie, it's almost six, do you want to go grab something to eat?" Erin said, entering her former guest room where Riley was hanging up some clothes.

Riley looked up from what she was doing, and then down at her phone and back at Erin, "Um sure, but can it be kind of fast? I have plans tonight". Erin was

slightly surprised, with the chaos of the past week she had literally never thought about the fact that Riley had a life and friends. She had seen a group of kids

at the funeral, but hadn't thought much past it. She knew Riley began her Junior year of high school on Tuesday and that she was a cheerleader and on

student council, but beyond that, she was clueless about the teenager's life. The more she thought about it, she was pretty clueless about teenagers in

general. Had it really been almost 15 years since she was that age? Thugs and drug dealers she could handle, this she was beginning to get nervous about.

"Uh, yeah it can be fast. There's a cute little Italian place down the street we can grab a bite at, let's go," Erin walked out of the room to grab her things and

waited for Riley at the door. She appeared a moment later, and the two walked the five minutes to the restaurant. Once they sat down, Erin figured she should

say something. Riley seemed perfectly content studying the menu. "So, what do you have going on tonight?" Erin asked, trying to strike up conversation. The

more she thought about it, wasn't Riley supposed to ask her about these kinds of things? Not that Erin was positioning to be a drill sergeant, but Riley was her

responsibility now, and did she really want a child she was responsible for running around the city? "Just an end of summer party at my friend Jack's" she

replied without looking up from the menu. Erin interrogated people for a living, but she knew she needed to tread lightly with this one. "Oh well that sounds

fun. Are all your friends going?" she asked with interest. "Yeah" Riley responded. Erin realized she wasn't going to get any information this way and had to

just dive in headfirst. "Well that'll be fun to see all your friends. Where's this party at?" Riley gave her a slightly agitated look, "I told you my friend Jack's".

"Well I meant like, where does he live? I don't' mean to be a nag but I do need to know where you are babe." Riley looked annoyed, "In Lincoln Park. On

Webster and Sheffield, would you also like the exact coordinates and to check it out on Google maps satellite view?" Erin was taken aback by the feistiness

she was met with. Before she could respond, the waitress came to take their orders. Once she left, Erin looked back at Riley. "Okay, cut the sass. You're my

responsibility Riley, and I care about you, so some ground rules are going to be that you have to tell me where you are, okay?" Erin spoke softly but seriously.

Riley looked almost surprised for a moment, but quickly regained her composure. "Seriously Erin? I have taken care of myself for months; actually scratch

that, basically since I was old enough to stay home alone. My mom always had another agenda, so you really don't need to put your life on hold to try to

control mine now. I really don't need it." Now Erin was the one with a look of surprise. Riley was right, her mother hadn't made her the first priority. "Well

honey, I'm sorry for that. I really am, it's not fair to you that you had to deal with that. But this is how it's going to be from now on, alright? I deal with the

scum of this city everyday and know exactly what can happen to kids who are on their own, and that isn't going to be you. Got it?" Riley just stared at her in

response, eventually her eyes softened and she slowly nodded. Erin gave her a half smile in return, and with that their food came.

* * *

The rest of dinner was surprisingly pleasant. Erin had asked Riley about her friends, classes, and cheer. Riley was unpredictably talkative, and told her all

about her group of friends and how the first football game was Friday night and the routine they had come up with that summer at Cheer camp. Once they

got home, Riley disappeared into her room to get ready, and Erin sat down on the couch. It seemed like the first minute she had had to think about herself in

over a week. Since Riley had plans, she decided to text Halstead and see if he had any plans for the night. She was going back to work on Tuesday, and had

to admit to herself she missed him. He texted her back that the get together at Molly's from the previous week had gotten pushed back and was actually

tonight. Erin smiled to herself and texted him back that she'd stop by. She was going to go see if Riley wanted help getting ready, but thought better of it.

Baby steps, she thought to herself.

30 minutes later Riley emerged from her room. Erin looked up to see her wearing a flowy tank top with a little too much cleavage, lacy shorts and wedges.

Her hair was lightly curled in the back, and her eye makeup was on the heavier side. She dropped her large purse on the table and pulled a few things out of

it to put into a smaller purse. She looked at her phone for a moment and then began walking to the door. She glanced back at Erin as she opened the door,

"See ya later", she said as she began to walk out. "Wait wait wait, "Erin called after her. Riley stopped and turned back. "Uh, how are you getting there? And

what time will you be home?" Erin could tell Riley wasn't happy about being questioned, but thought better than to argue. "My friend Blakely is picking me up

right now, I'm going to her house and then to Jack's. I'll probably just take an Uber home or sleep at her house after. Happy?" Erin knew she couldn't help but

get that last line in. "Home by one, got it?" Erin surprised herself with her firmness. Riley rolled her eyes, "yeah fine, whatever, bye". "Make good choices!"

Erin called after her. Riley slammed the door behind her and Erin smiled to herself. She could do this mom thing. How hard could it be?

* * *

Since Riley was gone, Erin headed to Molly's. She needed some social interaction and a night to herself. She was sitting at a table with Halstead, Casey,

Severide, Shay and Burgess. She went up to the bar to get a drink from Dawson. As soon as Gabby saw her, she gave her a big smile. "Hey girl, how have

you been?" Erin smiled back at her, "Hanging in there. It's definitely been a rough one. My next mission is to figure out how to handle a 16 year old." Gabby

gave her a knowing smile "She seemed like a sweet kid. I'm sure you guys will be just fine." "Thanks" Erin smiled back, grabbed her drink and headed back to

the table. She sat down and Severide looked over at her, "So, I hear you have a sidekick now?" Erin gave him a sarcastic smirk back, "She definitely doesn't

want to be my sidekick, but yeah. Taking it one day at a time". Severide squeezed her arm, "Well, ya know we're all here for you if you need some back up.

And in my opinion, CPD & CFD are some pretty strong back ups. " Erin smiled back, "thanks, I really appreciate it."

An hour later she looked at her phone and realized it was going on 12. "Well guys, Riley is suppose to begrudgingly be home by one so I should probably head

out, " she stood up and grabbed her things. "I don't know why kids get so weird about curfews, seriously what do they have to do past midnight anways,"

Shay laughed. Erin rolled her eyes "I don't even want to know".

* * *

Erin got home and got herself ready for bed. She got into bed, but knew she couldn't drift off until she heard Riley come in. She began thumbing through a

magazine and lost tracked of time. When she checked the time, it was 1:32. Still no Riley. "Shit, " Erin thought to herself. She called Riley's phone, and it rang

and rang. She hung up and sent her a text. 5 minutes later and still no response, Erin couldn't help but admit her first instinct was to get in her car and drive

up to Lincoln Park to go haul her ass home. It was the cop in her. She got out of bed and out into the living room, trying to determine what to do. Was this

normal Riley behavior? Was she the rebel kid, or was she a rule follower, and her lateness was a sign something was wrong? Before she could think anymore,

she heard the door open. She looked over and Riley was fumbling to get her key out of the lock. She was carrying her shoes in her hand, and looked like a

mess. Her tank top strap was down her arm on one side, and Erin could see that her cheeks were soaked with tears. She closed the door and dropped her

stuff, looked up and noticed Erin. She just rolled her eyes and walked right by her, into her room and slammed the door before Erin could even open her

mouth.

Erin was once again left alone with her thoughts, thinking about what she should do. She decided that missing her curfew by an hour was reason

enough for her to attempt to talk to Riley. She knocked softly on the door and didn't get a response. "Riley?" she said. Still getting no response, she waited a

few moments and then slowly opened the door. Riley had changed from her shorts into sweatpants, but was still in the rest of her outfit from the night. She

was lying on her side on her bed scrolling through her phone, facing Erin. She looked up at her when she walked in, and then immediately back down. Erin

slowly sat down on the bed next to her, and Riley sat up and tried to wipe her face. "It's almost 2am Riley…..what happened?" Erin asked. Riley didn't say

anything, and then her face fell. She immediately buried her face in Erin's shoulder and her whole body racked with sobs. Erin was taken aback at first, but

then wrapped her arms around Riley and slowly rubbed her back trying to calm her down. "Shhhh, hey it's okay. It's okay. What happened?" Erin couldn't help

it; her immediate response in any situation was to get to the root of the problem. Riley sat up hiccuping. "Everything Erin. Everything is wrong" she cried,

her voice cracking. Erin put her hand on her knee and gave her a minute to calm down. She suddenly smelled the alcohol and smoke wafting off of Riley's

hair. "Uh, Riley, have you been drinking?" Erin said, trying to still be compassionate but feeling the anger rise insider her. A 16 year old rolling in at 2am

reeking of alcohol and cigarettes? Detective Lindsay was not going to be down with that. Riley looked at her and just cried harder. "He won't even talk to me

anymore Erin. Just because I wouldn't sleep with him. I tried everything but I just can't make myself do it. I love him but he doesn't love me and no matter

what I do he never will." Riley buried her face in her hands and continued to sob. "Woah, woah honey. You are 16 years old. You don't do ANYTHING you don't

want to do, you got it?" Erin felt herself getting protective. This was baby Riley, the little girl she had seen take her first steps and break her arm playing

soccer in kindergarten. Since when was she old enough to even think about having sex? Erin rubbed her back and tried to calm her down. "Erin you don't get

it. I can do everything else but I can't do that. Leighton and Blakely and Savannah all do it but I can't. And then tonight Matt actually talked to me again, and

I thought I could do it and then get him back. And we were making out and went upstairs and I got so close and I couldn't do it. Even after all the Fireball

shots I just couldn't go all the way and and-, " Riley collapsed back onto Erin. Erin was trying to hide her shock and focus on Riley, but her mind was reeling.

"Shhh, Riley, stop. Look at me. She put her finger under Riley's chin and guided her face up so she was looking her in the eye. "Did he force you to do

anything you didn't want to do? If he did, you need to tell me NOW. " Erin said seriously. Riley just continued to cry, "No, " she croaked out. "I told you I

couldn't do it." Erin realized she was getting borderline delirious from the alcohol and crying so hard. Riley suddenly looked up, " I don't feel good. " No sooner

than Erin had grabbed the trashcan, Riley proceeded to throw up all of the alcohol she had ingested. After she got sick, she sat back on her bed and her

breathing started to normalize. Erin just sat next to her and rubbed her back. Riley instinctively put her head on Erin's chest and Erin ran her hand through

her hair. They sat in silence for a few minutes before Riley finally spoke, "Everything just hurts Erin, and I don't know what to do." With that, the tears started

to flow again. Erin tried to calm her but it was no use. Riley was having a breakdown. Erin reached over to Riley's dresser and opened a drawer and pulled out

a t-shirt. Through her tears, she helped her take off her top and put the it on, and pulled the hair tie off of her wrist and tied Riley's long hair up into a

ponytail. While changing her top she couldn't help but notice light bruising along her sides right under her bra strap, and made a mental note to ask her about

it later. She stood up and slowly guided the crying teen to the bathroom. She sat her down on the side of the tub and pulled out some makeup remover wipes

and began wiping her face of the eyeliner and mascara that stained her cheeks and her now swollen eyes. After getting Riley cleaned up, Erin brought her

back to her own room. She knew that if she had any hopes of getting to sleep tonight, she had to stay with Riley. "Come on babe, you can stay with me

tonight. " She was able to the still whimpering Riley into her bed and then climbed in next to her. She reached over to turn off the light and as soon as it got

dark, Riley's crying turned back into a full on sob. Erin snapped the light back on, "What's wrong Ri?" she asked her tiredly. Riley rolled over and snuggled into

Erin as sobs racked her body. "I just can't do this. Any of it. I just want it to be normal, " as Riley continued to cry, Erin couldn't help but remember her own

teenage self having the same feelings. As she tried pushed the thoughts out of mind, she held Riley close. "Don't worry baby, I'm not going anywhere".


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Someone asked if I had an actress in mind that would play Riley. I really didn't, but the more I think about it I'm going to go with Hayden Panettiere (Pre-Nashville, more Heroes era ) As always, I don't own anything, etc!

* * *

Erin begrudgingly opened her eyes to sunlight pouring in the window. She looked at her phone and saw it was just after 9AM. She rolled over and saw Riley sleeping soundly on the other side of her king size bed, her head buried under pillows. Erin figured she would sleep for a few more hours. She got up and decided that the best way to get rid of some of her stress was to go for a run. She pulled herself together and headed out the door, leaving a post it for Riley in the off chance she woke up.

She returned home an hour and a half later and was surprised to hear the shower running. A few minutes later it turned off, and she heard the bathroom door open and Riley's door slam. Erin got herself a cup of coffee from the Keurig and sat down at the table with her phone, half skimming social media and half deciding, as she had been for the last 2 hours, what she was going to do about Riley. She was starting to realize why the traditional family dynamic involved 2 parents; figuring out how to handle teenagers was hard.

She was still contemplating her thoughts when Riley finally emerged. Erin looked up and was surprised to see Riley looking completely put together, dressed in a cute bathing suit cover up and sandals, beach bag over her shoulder and sunglasses on top of her head. She looked up from her phone long enough to flash a quick smile at Erin, and began walking towards the door. "I'm going to the beach with Blakely and Savannah, I'll be home later and will text you if anything changes. See ya!" she bounced towards the door and Erin struggled to find the words.

"Woah, hold up," Erin finally mustered to the back of Riley as she was about to run out.

She could see Riley's shoulders sink, and knew that she deep down knew she wasn't going to get off so easy.

"You seriously think that something like last night can happen and you can just forget about it? No ma'am. Get over here and sit down. Now." Erin almost surprised herself with how stern she was.

Riley rolled her eyes and slunked over to sit next to Erin. She sat down and looked right down at her phone.

"First of all, the eye rolling has got to go. Second of all, "Erin snatched the phone out of her hand and put it next to her, "we are going to have an actual conversation, and your friends aren't going to be a part of it".

Riley didn't argue with her, it was clear she knew Erin was serious.

The two sat in silence for a minute, and Erin finally spoke again, "Well, if you have nothing to say for yourself, I guess I'll start. Drinking and smoking? Seriously?"

"I wasn't drink-" Riley started to dispute but Erin quickly shut her down. "Oh no. Do not even try to tell me you weren't drinking Riley. I'm not as old or dumb as you might think. You were trashed."

Riley was silent and then spoke again. "I wasn't smoking. Other people were so I might have smelled like it. And I didn't drive so why does it matter. Seriously Erin, it's high school. What do you want me to do, be a nun?"

"Last time I checked, and I tend to be pretty with it when it comes to the law, drinking under the age of 21 is illegal. Now unless that's changed, it's not okay with me. Got it?" Erin shot right back at her.

Riley started to roll her eyes, and then stopped herself and just glared back at Erin. "Seriously? Don't you deal with heroin addicts and other thugs all day? How can you think this is such a big deal?"

The younger girl was starting to push her buttons. "Because you're better than that and have higher standards. You 're lucky enough to not be rock bottom, so unfortunately you're going to have to be a law abiding citizen."

Riley said nothing back to her. She knew this was a battle she wasn't going to win.

"Now, "Erin's expression remained hard but her tone softened, "you want to tell me about what happened last night?"

"No" Riley snapped back.

Erin sucked in a breath, "Ok then. You want to tell me about…..Matt?" Erin gave her a half smirk but her eyes looked sympathetic.

That got Riley's attention. She gave Erin a rigid look, and then said "How do you know who Matt is?"

"And you're trying to tell me you weren't drinking?" Erin said back. "You were really upset Riley."

"He's just my ex-boyfriend. I might still kind of like him, so sometimes when we're together I get a little wound up. It's really not a big deal" Riley was treading lately, not fully remembering what she told Erin that night before, and clearly not wanting to reveal much. "Seriously Erin, I know I was drunk and a crying mess but I think it was just the last week catching up to me. It won't happen again, okay?" Erin could tell she was trying to remove herself from the situation as quickly as possible.

"Okay. I believe you. But sweetie…"Erin hated to do it, but she knew Riley needed to hear it. She sighed, "You don't sleep with someone just because you feel like you have to. It's not worth it. And you especially don't do stupid things like rip shots to try to make yourself do it. If you're not ready, you're not ready, and that's more than okay. Nothing good comes from 16 year olds having sex. You'll never look back and regret not doing it, but you will regret putting yourself in a situation you don't want to be in," Erin tried to be light but get her point across.

Riley paled a little as she realized that her cousin knew her dirty laundry. She drew in a sharp breath. "I really don't mean to be a bitch but this is seriously something I do not want to talk to you about. Can I leave now?" She started to stand up.

"I'm serious….please just be carful okay?" Erin watched the younger girl squirm. "Technically, you should be grounded for a whole slew of things, but I think it would be good for you to see your girlfriends. Home by 8, and no plans until school on Tuesday. Got it?" Riley knew better than to argue. She nodded her head, grabbed her phone back from Erin, and walked out the door.

Erin didn't know what to think. She thought she had done the right thing, but she wasn't sure. Should she lock Riley up for weeks? Make her see a counselor? She knew she just needed to take things one day at a time, but it was hard.

Her phone buzzed and it was from Antonio. He was having a BBQ for Labor Day the next day. She texted him back she would be there along with her ornery subordinate.

Erin figured she better start pulling some things together to get back into her life this week. She hadn't been at work for 10 days, which in her world felt like an eternity. She threw in laundry, cleaned up the kitchen, and sat down on the couch. She wasn't used to having down time, and she definitely wasn't used to having a 16-year-old taking up the majority of her thoughts.

* * *

Erin ended up heading over to Voight's later that . She hadn't seen him or Justin in awhile. She walked into backyard where Voight was on the porch with a beer. She sat down next to him. "How ya doin?" Voight gave her a half smile. She smiled back, "I could use one of those". He tossed her a beer. "How's the kid?" Voight asked her knowingly. She let out a long sigh, "I have a feeling going to age me quickly". Voight smiled, "So giving you a taste of your own medicine? Like her already". Erin took a swig and threw her head back to take in the warm sunshine & just breathe. "I'm telling ya. You think you've seen it all in this job, but teenage girls are a whole different beast, " she droned. Voight hit her arm, "you'll do fine kid".

* * *

A few hours later she was home, in what she now deemed her lot in life, sitting on the couch waiting for Riley. It was almost 9. Erin was trying to hold off texting her, waiting to see if she might get some sort of outreach from Riley first, telling her where she was or that she was going to be late. So far, no dice. It was one minute until the hour mark, when she reasoned with herself that she would finally give in and text her, when the door opened and Riley came bouncing in. Her tan looked a little bit darker, and she had slight sunburn under her cheeks. Erin took comfort in knowing that she at least was at the beach and didn't lie about that too.

Before Erin could say anything, Riley surprisingly spoke first. "Hey! Sorry I know I'm late, I got sidetracked. It won't happen again!" she said jovially as she took her stuff into her room. Erin was dumbfounded thinking about this Riley and the Riley that walked through the door a mere 16 hours ago.

Riley came back out into the living room a few minutes later dressed in yoga pants and a tank top, showing off her dark, end of summer tan lines. She sat on the opposite end of the couch as Erin, glued to her phone.

"Can we put on Real Housewives or something?" she said without looking up.

"Uh sure. How was your day?" Erin asked her, reaching for the remote.

"Fine." Riley replied, again not looking up but Erin could see a big smile spread across her face.

"Well that sounds a lot more than fine" Erin smiled back. She reached over and swatted the phone out of Riley's hands. "Tell me what has you smiling sweets".

Riley looked up with a big grin still across her face. She didn't particularly want to tell Erin about her day, but at the same time was busting at the seams to talk about it.

"Welllllll, after the beach we walked over to this outdoor patio where a bunch of the boys were and Matt was there and he talked to me! Seriously, it was the first time we've hung out sober all summer where he actually voluntarily sat by me and talked to me and had an actual conversation! It was seriously so good, and then he texted me the whole way home. He wants to hang out after practice this week, just like chill like we used to when we were dating, "Riley was practically drooling as she spoke.

Erin did not want to bring her down from her high, but listening to Riley talk like this about a boy who had clearly broken her was painful. She knew she had to respond carefully.

"That's great sweetie. You know to just…..be careful right? It sounds like you guys have a history and I don't' want to see you get hurt," Erin said warily.

Riley stopped smilling. "I know what you're thinking, but seriously it's not like that. I think it's just been so chaotic the last few times I've been around him, it always spirals out of control. But this just feels different, kind of like we're starting over yano?"

Erin gave her a smile. "Just be careful, alright?"

Riley smiled and started rolling her eyes at Erin, before realizing what she was doing and let out a giggle. "I know I know, I will. Promise. Now can we watch Real Housewives?"

Erin playfully kicked her and turned on the TV.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: I don't own any characters, places, schools, etc.! Please review & let me know what you think! Sorry this is a little short, it's a bit of a filler chapter:)

Labor Day Monday was as perfect as it got for a summer day in Chicago. Erin went to the gym, showered, and was ready for the day and Riley still hadn't emerged from her room. Around noon, Erin finally decided to wake her up since they were going to Antonio's later that afternoon.

"Knock knock sleeping beauty, " Erin opened Riley's door. The younger girl stirred and looked over at her, "What?" she said crankily.

"Wow, someone's not a morning person. Or should I say afternoon? "Erin smiled at her. Riley rolled over and put the pillow back over her head.

"Just an FYI, we're leaving in 3 hours. I know how long it takes you to make yourself glamorous so this is your warning." Erin left the door open and went back to the living room.

By the time 3PM rolled around, Erin and a not so happy Riley were in the car on the way to Antonio's.

"Why do I have to go to this?" Riley asked stubbornly, all the while not looking up from her phone.

"Because, " Erin began, "this is basically my family, thus making them your family. So you should really get to know them." Riley didn't say anything in return, but Erin could feel the eye roll next to her.

* * *

They arrived at the Dawson's and went around back. Halstead saw Erin first and came over. "Hey, how ya doin?" He gave her a half hug. Erin smiled back, "good, loving this weather. Oh this is Riley. Riley, this is my partner, Jay Halstead."

Erin couldn't help but notice Riley's brief staring at Halstead. She smirked to herself, knowing she wasn't the only one who thought he was easy on the eyes.

Erin dragged Riley around and introduced her to everyone. In a matter of 20 minutes, Riley had met the majority of the intelligence unit, and Firehouse 51.

"Where's Voight?" Erin asked, realizing she hadn't seen him yet. "Workin' something in Back of the Yards, he'll stop by at some point," Antonio answered her.

Olinsky noticed Riley just standing next to Erin, looking bored and playing with her phone. "Hey Riley, my daughter Lexi is over on the patio and is probably just as miserable as you look. Why don't you go hang out with her." Olinsky pointed over to a bored looking Lexi, sitting in an Adirondack chair looking much like Riley did much of the time, face buried in her phone. Riley looked at Erin and then back over to where Alvin was pointing, sighed and slunked over to where Lexi was sitting.

"You should've told me kids this age were such a treat, " Erin said to Olinsky while grabbing a beer. Al smiled back at her "Eh, Lexi's a pretty good kid. Sort of outta her mind sometimes, but a good kid for the most part. " He looked over toward Riley, who was now sitting opposite of Lexi and making small talk. "She's been threw a lot, yano? Ya gotta just take it slow, " he pat gave her a reassuring pat on the arm before walking away.

Erin turned around and was face to face with Kelly Severide, just walking in the back gate with a six-pack in one hand. He smiled at her "Hey Lindsay, how's it going?" Erin gave him a hug. Severide was like a brother to her. "It's going." She nodded over towards Riley. "Oh cool, you brought the kiddo!"

"Yeah, against her will," Erin smiled. Severide just laughed, "is she still mad at you for making her come home at the unrighteous hour of 1am, preventing her from painting the town with all the other rugrats?"

"Oh god, don't even get me started, "Erin sighed, and briefly filled him on how the rest of her Saturday night, leaving out the details for Riley's privacy.

"Geez," Severide furrowed his brow. "That Matt kid sounds like a punk, you better keep him away from her. "

Erin smiled at him, "You're calling a 16 year old boy a punk because he made her cry?" Severide's protectiveness was one thing she loved about him.

"I don't know Erin, it just sounds like a bad situation if she's that hung up on him. Remember, girls are crazy" he winked at her. She hit his arm and walked with him over to the rest of the crew.

Erin spent the rest of the evening laughing with her friends, and Riley spent it with Lexi Olinsky, texting and occasionally talking to each other.

"So where do you go to school?" Riley asked Lexi. She seemed nice enough, and Riley had to admit she was glad to have a getaway from Erin and all her CPD & CFD friends; the last thing Riley needed was a bunch of adults giving her sympathy.

"St. X, what about you?"

"Park Prep"

They both just nodded at each other's answers, and made small talk about their sports teams that played each other. Lexi knew the general gist of Riley's story, but didn't say anything about it, figuring she wouldn't want to talk about it. Lexi gave her the general run down of the who's who of the Intelligence Unit and CFD crew.

"Wait, " Riley smiled coyly, "so you're saying that there's a thing between Erin and that Halstead guy?" Lexi giggled back at her. "Definitely, sometimes when I'm grounded my dad makes me go sit at the station afterschool, and it is so obvious. They've totally hooked up and if not, they need to. The girls both giggled.

Erin looked over at the younger girls just in time to see Riley looking back at her, and then back at Lexi and giggling. She didn't even want to know what they were talking about. The group was starting to dispand.

"Molly's?!" Shay asked. Everyone was agreeing, but Erin had to bail out. "Not me, I've got to get that one home-. "

"Oh you can bring her, " Dawson cut her off. "It's Monday and its only 7, I promise we won't card" she winked.

Erin smiled back at her, "Nah, thanks though. She has school tomorrow and I'm going to do everything in my power to attempt to keep her out of a bar for at least a couple more years. Could be rough." She said her goodbyes, and started walking over to grab Riley, when Halstead saddled up next to her.

"Hey" he smiled. She smiled back. She couldn't help herself, Jay Halstead made her melt. "So, I just want you to know….if you ever need back up or help with Riley, I'm here, yano? Like don't worry about work or…"

"Jay, I know" Erin gave him a soft look. "I really appreciate it. I'll see ya tomorrow." A lingering stare held on between the two until Erin finally turned away. "Riley, C'mon" she called.

Riley stood up and looked at Lexi, "It was nice meeting you, I'm sure I'll see you around soon" Lexi smiled back at her and Riley ran off behind Erin.

The two got in the car and didn't say anything. "So, Lexi is a sweetie. Did you guys have fun?" Erin asked her to break the silence.

"It was fine, " Riley replied. "Do you like your partner Jay?"

Erin was shocked to hear those words come out of Riley's mouth. "What? No. We're partners. I spend 12 hours+ a day with the guy. Why would you think that?" she stumbled to defend herself.

Riley smirked back at her, "I was just wondering."

* * *

The next morning Riley was up by 5:30 to get ready for school. Erin was surprised to see her up. "You do know you don't leave for school for another 2 hours, right?" Riley just gave her a death stare and went back to doing her hair. Erin laughed to herself.

An hour later, Erin grabbed her bag and keys. "Are you sure you don't want me to drive you?" she persisted to Riley.

"Oh my god, I told you. Why would you fight LSD morning rush hour traffic? I've taken the L to school since I was in 7th grade, just like everyone else. It's just a different stop, I'll be fine." Riley said back to her, obviously annoyed.

"Just making sure! Okay, so after school you have practice until 5 right? I'll try to be home around 6, but you never know. I'll text you and let you know what's going on" Erin said hurriedly.

"Don't worry about it, I'm hanging out with Matt after his football practice so I'll be home later" Riley said while carefully affixing yet another layer of mascara to her eyelashes. She could see Erin giving her a sideways look behind her in the mirror.

She turned around, "I won't have homework, so what's the big deal?" she said haughtily.

"Hey, don't get an attitude, " Erin warned her. "Just be careful, got it? Keep me posted on what you're doing and when you're coming home." Erin decided that insisting on open lines of communication was a better alternative than imposing a curfew.

"Finneeeeee, I'll see you later" Riley went back to fixing her makeup.

Erin kissed the top of her head, "Have a great first day sweets!" And with that walked out the door.

The Lindsay girls were ready for the first day of their new normal.


	5. Chapter 5

AN: I am so sorry for the loooong delay in posting this! I was on vacation, and then had it written and ready to post, but didn't like the direction it was going and completely re-wrote the whole thing. Please review and let me know what you think, and I'll update soon! As always, I own nothing except Riley and the storyline

Erin felt like she had never left District 21. Her day was off and running from the start and countless cups of bad coffee later, she couldn't believe it was already 4.

She was going through files at her desk, looking through some gang members and trying to make connections in a drug ring that had left 3 people dead in less than that many days when Antonio walked up the stairs.

She looked up and smiled at him, "rough day?"

"Another day in the life," he smirked back at her, grabbing his own cup of tasteless coffee.

"How's the kid?" He asked with genuine interest. Erin gave a wary smile back at him. "I'm taking it one day at a time. The first day of school was today and she had cheerleading practice afterwards, so I'm hoping that gives her some normalcy."

"Severide mentioned that some punk kid was giving her a hard time. What's his name? We should run him through."

Erin couldn't help but laugh at Antonio's seriousness, but loved his protective side coming through at the same time. "You mean her 16 year old ex-boyfriend that made her cry because he was being a typical 16 year old boy? I don't think we need to be worried about him running with the drug lords."

"Ya never know Erin, better safe than sorry," Antonio smiled back at her.

"Seriously, Voight would run any guy I ever mentioned through the system and if he found so much as the kid punched a kid in 3rd grade that was it. I'm not going to put her through that quite yet," Erin smirked.

"Hey, it worked" a raspy voice bellowed. Voight's head popped out of his office and he gave her a wink. Erin just rolled her eyes as she laughed.

* * *

By the time Erin got out of the station and home it was almost 8. She wasn't surprised to come home to any empty apartment and no sign of Riley. She shot her a text, and threw some ingredients into a pan for stir-fry.

It was after 9 when she started to become agitated over Riley's absence. She was starting to question how to handle the younger girl. She wanted to go the open communication route, but if Riley wasn't going to cooperate with her, Erin wasn't going to have her running wild around the city.

Erin was taking out her nervous energy on steaming up veggies when Riley finally waltzed in. She was wearing workout clothes from practice, and wordlessly dropped her backpack and cheer bag on the floor, glancing at Erin and giving her an emotionless "Hey" as she walked by.

"Hey, how was school?" Erin asked enthusiastically.

"Fine" Riley called and then her bedroom door slammed.

"Here we go again, " Erin thought to herself. She turned down the heat and walked towards Riley's closed door. She couldn't help but notice that Riley's phone was lying in the pile of her things she left by the door.

She knocked on the door, "Riley? Can I come in?" She got no response and slowly opened the door. Riley was sitting on the floor, back against her bed, playing with a stress ball. Erin sat down quietly next to her. The two were quiet for a few moments before Erin spoke.

"So. How was your day?"

Riley continued to stare straight ahead. "Yano, I'm pretty used to not being questioned about every aspect of my life. You don't have to take the time out of your day to interrogate me, it's really okay."

"Well, lucky for you that I care about you and want to hear about your day. What happened?" Erin asked softly.

Riley sighed. "I went to school, my friends are in my lunch so that's great, I had cheer after school and I almost got dropped from a mount so that sucked, then I met Matt after football ended and we went back to his house to hang out. And now I'm here. Anything else?"

Erin carefully studied Riley's side profile. Her hair was messily tied back, and her eye make up from that morning seemed to have rubbed off. She looked empty.

"Any reason you left that precious connection to the world that is usually glued to your face out there?" Erin dove in.

"Maybe I'm just not in the mood to talk to anyone." Riley half-heartedly snapped back.

"Just because you almost fell off a mount?" Erin smiled, trying to lighten the mood. "Talk to me Riley."

Riley didn't say anything. Erin wasn't trying to pressure her, but wanted her to feel comfortable and safe when she was upset.

"You know you can tell me anything sweetie, "Erin said, looking directly at her. "No judgment, no repercussions."

Riley finally turned her head to face Erin and that's when Erin saw her eyes were glassy, and she looked pale.

"Anything you want to talk about?"

"No" Riley's voice cracked, but she quickly recomposed herself "Seriously Erin, can we just not do this now? I just want to go to bed."

Erin decided that letting her be was the best thing for the time being. "Okay. Let me know if you need me."

Erin got up off the floor and went back to the kitchen. She dumped all the stir-fry she made into plastic containers and put them in the fridge. She couldn't help but worry about Riley, and she had lost her appetite.

Erin got herself ready for bed. She grabbed Riley's phone out of her bag and brought it into her room. Riley was lying on top of her bed, still squeezing the same stress ball. Erin put the phone down on the nightstand and bent down next to her.

"Are you okay?" she asked looking directly into the younger girl's big brown eyes.

"No. But I don't want to talk about it." Riley responded dryly, wrapping herself in the blanket next to her.

It wasn't what Erin wanted to hear, but she found some solace that Riley was actually opening up to her and telling her how she felt.

Erin gave the younger girl a sympathetic look, "Want me to lay with you for a while?"

Riley seemed surprised by the offer for a moment, but then slowly nodded her head yes. Erin lay down on the bed next to her, and ran her hand through Riley's hair. Riley put her head on Erin's chest and closed her eyes. It killed Erin to not know what was upsetting her younger cousin, but brought her relief to know she could give Riley the soothing and comfort she needed, that she unfortunately most likely hadn't been receiving from Marleigh the past few years. Erin laid alone with her thoughts, as she eventually felt Riley's breath shallow as she fell into a much needed sleep.

* * *

The next few days were surprisingly uneventful. Erin worked long hours, but when she came home at night Riley was there, usually watching TV, doing homework, or on her phone. She had made no mention of Tuesday night again, and Erin thought it wise to just let it go for the time being.

Friday morning, Erin popped in the bathroom to say goodbye to Riley before she headed out there door. "So the games at 7:30 tonight right? I'll be there, I think Halstead is coming with me."

Riley turned around and smirked at her, "Your partner?"

Erin could feel herself getting defensive. "Yeah, so?"

"Oh nothing, " Riley turned around to get back to her hair, still smiling at Erin.

"What? It's not illegal to bring him to a high school football game so I'm not sitting up there with all the parents by myself!" Erin said quickly.

"Whatever you say, " Riley quipped. "See ya!"

Erin gave her a side-eye and then walked out the door.

* * *

That night, Erin and Halstead walked into the football stadium at Riley's school. Severide and Dawson were tagging along too, which Erin felt better about proving to Riley that it wasn't a date, but at the same time she couldn't help but feel a little disappointed deep down that her and Jay werent' going to get alone time. She forced herself to snap out of it.

The group found a row in the bleachers and sat down.

"I definitely feel…..old. Or young. I'm not sure. " Halstead mused as he looked around at the high school students and middle aged parents mulling about.

The group laughed, but agreed.

"Which one is Riley? All those cheerleaders looked the same from up here, " Severide laughed from his seat next to Erin.

Erin pointed out Riley to him, her hair up in a volumized ponytail, laughing on the track with her friends. It made Erin smile to see Riley so happy, she felt like it had been awhile.

"Cheerleaders sure have changed since my day, " Dawson quipped, noting the tight skirts and midriff baring tops the high schoolers were adorning.

"Yeah, " Severide piped in, "I don't think I like it was much as I would have 15 years ago."

Erin giggled and rolled her eyes at his over protectiveness.

The game started, and Severide and Halstead got into it. Gabby and Erin mostly watched the cheerleaders and talked.

"So, which one is the kid Riley used to date?" Gabby asked Erin, watching the players run up and down the field.

"I was actually just trying to figure that out. His last name is Shrinzeler, but I can't make out the names on the back of the Jerseys" Erin replied, trying to study each player as he ran on and off the field.

As if he were reading her mind, the announcer suddenly bellowed from the press box, "And TOUCHDOWN by #15, Maaaaatttttt Shrinzeler!"

Gabby looked over at Erin and smiled, "Well, looks like we got our answer!"

Erin watched as the boy that had broken Rileys heart, who she realized was the quarterback, ran out of the endzone and was patted on the back by his teammates. She glanced at Riley too, and noticed that she didn't seem too enthusiastic about the touchdown, simply clapping her pom-poms back and forth with the other cheerleaders.

Soon it was halftime, and the crew watched the cheerleader's performance. Erin caught herself holding her breath as Riley was tossed high in the air, twisting and flipping around.

"How the hell can they do that? It's like she's a rag doll!" Halstead expressed his concern with the acrobatics happening on the football field.

Erin & Dawson both laughed, but Dawson couldn't hold back her concern either "Do you know how easily they can could snap a bone?" she pondered out loud.

Erin gave her a look. "Don't remind me!"

"Sorry!"

The game ended, with Park Prep rolling over their opponents 28-14. The cheerleaders and fans stormed the field, and Erin kept her eyes on Riley. As the crowd was dispersing, she noticed a certain #15 and Riley cross paths. They stopped and spoke to each other for a moment, and then Riley turned to walk away and he grabbed her arm. Riley pulled away and Erin could see him tighten his grip. It took everything in her not to jump out of the bleachers. Halstead and Severide noticed it too.

"Who the hell is that kid she's talking to?" Severide said standing up, Halstead quickly following suit. If Riley hadn't pulled away from Matt again, this time successfully, and jogged to catch up with her friends in that moment, Erin swore Severide would have been down on the field in 5 seconds flat.

She didn't want to rev up the guys, so she blew it off, "Who knows, probably some kid she knows from school. Come on, let's get out of here." Erin's mind was reeling. She knew that was Matt, and she didn't like what she saw.

The group decided to go to Molly's for drinks, but Erin wanted to find Riley first to check in. "I'll just meet you guys there," she said, but Halstead cut her off, "It's fine, I'll go with you." They parted ways from Severide & Dawson, and headed down the track to where the cheerleaders were getting their stuff together.

Riley was walking with 2 other girls when Erin caught up with her. "Hey sweetie, great job tonight!" Erin squeezed her arm.

Riley smiled back at her, "Thanks. I'm going to the after party with the team, so I'll catch ya later okay? Oh by the way these are my friends Blakely and Savannah."

Erin smiled at the other girls, and then looked back at Riley. "Home at one, and no drinking. I am dead serious, " she said looking Riley in the eyes.

"Yeah, okay fine, I'll see you later, " Riley said sounding slightly agitated, turning to follow her friends out of the stadium.

Erin sighed, and Halstead could tell she wasn't happy.

"So uh…those look like the girls I went to high school with that had…a lot of fun" Halstead smirked as he watched the girls leave.

Erin slugged his arm, "Not helping!"

"Just being honest!" He laughed. "What are you bets that she's going to be home at 12:59 and dead sober?" He couldn't help himself.

Erin exhaled heavily, "Over my dead body. C'mon, lets go get a drink"

Erin and Halstead met up with Severide, Dawson, Shay, Antonio & Burgess at Molly's. Erin was enjoying herself, but couldn't get Riley off her mind. She was getting ready to call it a night around midnight when her phone binged that she had a text from Riley, "Sleeping at Blakely's."

Halstead saw it from over her shoulder and smirked, "I mean, at least she's responsible?"

Erin rolled her eyes, "It means that I am having another drink" she smiled back.

* * *

Erin woke up early the next morning due to a slight headache. She rolled over at saw it was only 7:30. She mustered the energy to get out of bed and go find some Advil. She was walking out of the bathroom when she heard the front door open. She walked into the living room and came face to face with Riley, dressed in jeans and a sultry top, presumably her outfit from the party the night before, with her hair a mess and makeup smeared.

Erin raised an eyebrow at her, "Little early?"

Riley clearly did not expect her to be awake "Uh yeah, I woke up and couldn't fall back asleep so I left" she stumbled.

"And Blakely didn't have, yano, sweats or anything you could borrow last night? And where is all your cheer and school stuff?" Erin's headache was gone and her interrogation mode was on.

"Um I left it in her car. And I didn't want to wake her up, " Riley continued to stammer.

"You know how unbelievable this sounds right? Sit. " Erin pointed to the table. Riley sank into a chair and Erin sat down across from her.

"So. Let's start from the beginning. What did we do at this party last night?" Erin gave Riley a tight smile.

Riley sighed, contemplating if she should cut her losses. "Hung out with my friends." She stopped, seeing if she could get away with short and sweet.

Erin wasn't having it. "And did what? And drank what?"

Riley was doing anything to avoid making eye contact. "Played games and drank….juice."

Erin had to give her credit for her creativity. "You're already stuck in this house with me for the rest of the weekend. Give it up before it's next weekend too."

Riley realized Erin wasn't playing around and groaned. "Lots of drinking games and jungle juice and can I please have some of those" she said indicating the bottle of Ibuprofen Erin was still holding.

Erin realized she had leverage. "When this conversation is over. Which it is not."

"You're seriously treating me like a junkie," Riley said haughtily.

Erin chose to ignore her, "Where did you sleep last night?"

"Blakely's"

"No you didn't. One more shot"

Riley narrowed her eyes, "Why do you care?"

Erin's eyes softened, "Because it's my responsibility to keep you safe and I care about you. You are 16 years old and in high school, your life is not a college frat party. Now answer the question."

Riley stared back at her before her gaze drifted, "Matt's, he had the party and his parents are out of town, " she said quietly.

Erin's fury at the situation dwindled with the dejectedness in Riley's voice.

"And why did you do that?" she asked back gently.

Riley finally looked back at Erin and the tears started to fall, "Because I just want to be with him, but he doesn't want to be with me." She put her face in her hands.

Erin instinctively moved over a seat so she was next to Riley. She put her hand on her back, and the younger girl immediately buried her face in Erin's shoulder and continued to cry.

Erin ran her hand through Riley's hair, which reeked of alcohol. She gave her a minute to recompose herself before moving back so she was looking at Riley again. "And why do you think that sweetie?" she asked.

Riley looked miserable. "Because I slept with him and he still doesn't care" she looked away from Erin.

Erin was not expecting Riley to tell her that. It took her a moment to process what she was hearing and formulate how to respond to it.

"Just….last night? Are-are you sure that you wanted to, you weren't drunk and- " the cop in her was coming out.

"No. On Tuesday night. And then nothing changed. So I thought last night after the party I would stay with him and he would want to be with me so I did but then this morning he still didn't care. He got up early to go to Jimmy's lake house for the weekend with the boys and told me I could just sleep and let myself out and then he just left. He didn't even care Erin. It's like he had me stay over so he could have sex with me and then he just left. He doesn't even care and now I'm just the idiot that he sleeps with" Riley blubbered out.

Erin just held her cousin while she cried. Her confusion and pain was contagious, and Erin could feel her heart breaking for her. "Look at me. Everyone makes mistakes okay? And everyone gets their heart broken by boys who are douche bags. You are not an idiot, got it?" she wiped Riley's tears from her cheeks.

"Well I feel like one," Riley nearly whispered back.

Erin gave her a half smile. "Well you're not. Go take a hot shower and get some sleep, and then we're going to talk later."

Erin stood up and guided Riley to do the same. Once she heard the bathroom door close, she sat back down, popped a few Asprin and put her head in her hands. She may be able to take down the gangs and drug lords of Chicago, but the world of Riley had her in way over her head.


	6. Chapter 6

Sorry for the delay in updating! I know where I want this story to go, I just keep changing my mind on how to get there, thus lots of rewrites:) This isn't my favorite chapter, and I promise this story will go beyond Lexi/Erin soon….just need to get through some details first! Please review and let me know what you think!

OH, and I really don't know anything about the effects of certain drugs, etc.! And I don't own anything except Riley & this storyline, etc!

* * *

It was 3pm by the time Riley finally emerged from her room and joined Erin on the couch. Erin had spent the day contemplating what to do with Riley, and maniacally cleaning every inch of the apartment to try to burn off some nervous energy.

Riley sat down on the opposite end of the couch. She was in sweats and a cheer t-shirt, wearing no make up and hair on top of her head. Erin flipped off the TV and turned to face her.

"Are you feeling better?" she gave Riley a weak smile.

Riley nodded her head yes.

"Are you ready to talk?"

Riley looked away and nodded her head slightly. She wasn't ready, but she knew she had to face the music at some point.

Erin decided to just dive right, forgetting her rehearsed words she had mulled over in her head all day. "Is this going to just be me talking, or can we actually have a two way conversation?"

Riley looked a little taken aback. "I, I…..conversation" She stammered out quietly.

"Well let's just get this out of the way. Are you on the pill?" she asked warily.

Riley started to shake her head and then thought better of it and spoke,"No."

Erin sucked in another breath. "Well do you think you should be on it?"

Riley could feel her face getting hot "I don't know. I guess so."

"I'm going to make you a Dr. appointment this week. Is that okay with you?

"Yeah," Riley replied quietly.

"You used protection right?" Erin said seriously.

"Yeah, " Riley said again.

Erin was quiet for a moment before she spoke again, "Anything else you'd like to add?"

Riley finally looked up at her, "No."

Erin accepted that answer. "Okay then, moving on. You're grounded through next weekend. And from now on, anytime you drink, the consequences are going to increase. Got it?"

Riley rolled her eyes. "Are you kidding me?"

"No, I'm not" Erin said back evenly. "You're underage, it clearly inhibits your decision making, and its not safe. End of discussion."

Riley just stared at the wall across the room.

Erin knew to tread lightly, "Anything you want to tell me about Matt?"

Riley looked over at her sharply, her eyes filled with tears. Erin could tell she was willing herself not to cry.

Erin moved over on the couch so she was next to Riley.

Riley blinked back her tears. "He's not a bad guy. He just doesn't love me anymore. When we broke up at the beginning of the summer, it was because I wouldn't sleep with him. I wanted to I just…..couldn't. So he said that I obviously didn't want to be with him. Since he was talking to me again I thought I had another shot. But I obviously don't, so now I'm just a slut whose desperate for attention," Riley's eyes were glassy and she turned away from Erin as she bit her lip and sniffled.

Erin's heart broke for Riley. "Hey, listen to me. This is not your fault, got it?" she was grasping for words to make her cousin feel better. "Sometimes you do things that feel right at the time and regret them later, it's a part of life sweets."

Riley kept her eyes cast downward, "But I gave it up for a guy that I wasn't even dating because I was so desperate for him to be with me. That's not a normal part of life and I can't take it back."

Erin didn't know what was the right thing to say.

"You're right, you can't take it back. But you're going to be okay. Everyone makes mistakes honey."

She was debating on whether or not to continue, and decided to take the plunge.

"Sometimes, you'll do anything to fill a void in your life, even if it isn't going to fill it. It makes you feel better in the moment, but then you're back at square one. Sex, drugs….they can be temporary uppers." Erin said, biting her own lip.

It took everything in Erin to hold back her own tears; she so badly wanted to be able to put Riley's life back together.

Riley curled her legs up to her chest, still blinking back tears.

"Well if I was trying to fill a void, it's definitely still there. Because now I have no chance with Matt, and I don't have my mom." With that, the floodgates opened. Riley buried her face in her knees and her body shook with sobs.

Erin put her hand on Riley's back, but the younger girl shook her off. She turned her tear soaked face towards Erin. "I just want it to be normal. I want my mom, and my boyfriend, and my life." she heaved out. She was crying so hard she began choking.

"Riley, Riley, you need to calm down, " Erin said firmly, grabbing her arm.

Riley once again shook her off, "Can you just leave me alone for like a second," she shrieked, crying even harder.

"Not until you calm down Riley," Erin said. She wrapped both arms around Riley and held her, despite her sobbing and thrashing to break free.

"Erin I just can't okay. Just stop and-" Riley couldn't get the words out through her tears.

Erin didn't loosen her grip, and kept her arms wrapped around Riley. After another minute, Riley stopped resisting. She buried her face in Erin' chest and held onto her. "I can't Erin…..I can't" she hiccupped out, her sobs continuing.

"Shhhhh, you're okay. I'm here. You're going to be okay, " Erin held her close.

After a few more minutes of Riley trying to choke out words and Erin trying to soothe her, Riley slowly sat up, still sobbing and shaking. "I-I-I just need my….." she trailed off and stood up, steadying her balance, and walked toward her room, Erin trailing closely behind her.

"Riley, you need to-" Riley slammed the door.

Erin grabbed the handle, but it was already locked. "Riley, open the door."

She got not response. She decided to go old school and pulled a bobby pin out of her hair. She had the door unlocked in 30 seconds. She swung it open just in time to see Riley toss a pill bottle into her purse.

"Riley, what are you doing, " Erin's voice raised. Riley was laying down on her bed, face in her pillow, still crying. Erin hurriedly pulled the bottle out of Riley's bag. It didn't have label, and she couldn't tell what the pills were. She sat down next to Riley on her bed.

"Riley, look at me right now, " Erin said forcefully. Riley just continued to cry. "Riley, NOW" Erin gently pushed her arm to roll her over. "What are these pills, and how many did you take?"

Riley spoke through her sobs, "They're just Xanax, only one" she sniffled. "They make me zone out. I need to zone out Erin." She moaned.

Erin sat down next to her and rubbed her back. Riley continued to cry. "That's how I had sex with Matt Erin. I just zoned out. I just want to zone out of my life."

Erin felt helpless. Riley may be 16, but in that moment she felt like a baby to Erin. She wanted nothing more than to take care of her and make her feel whole again.

"Drugs Riley? Seriously?"

Riley's tears were still falling. "They're not illegal. They just….help."

Erin sighed, "Having prescription drugs that aren't yours is illegal babe. It's also dangerous, you shouldn't be taking any medication that isn't given to you by a doctor, ya got it? If you're having a hard time, you need to tell someone. I can help you if you talk to me." She gave Riley a minute to respond, but was met with sniffles..

"Where did you get the pills?" she knew it was a long shot, but she couldn't help but ask.

"It's not hard. And it's not like coke or something Erin so just forget about it" With that, Riley reached out to take the bottle out of Erin's hands.

Erin immediately moved her arm back, "Are you kidding me? No way. These are going down the toilet. These aren't safe, and are illegal. You don't even know where they came from. I know you're having a tough time right now Ri, but using these to zone out isn't going to help, because at the end of the day the drugs wear off and you're left to pick up the pieces of your reality." Erin didn't mean to sound so harsh, but the words came tumbling out.

Riley looked a little taken aback by Erin's severity, but she could tell it resonated with her.

The tears that had begun to slow started to pick up again. "Then what am I suppose to do Erin, those pills are my lifeline" she rolled back over and put her face in her pillow.

"Hey, " Erin said seriously, once again rolling her over so that her now swollen eyes were looking directly into Erin's own. "That is not the way. I'm going to make you that Dr. appointment, and if she thinks you need something, we'll talk about it then" she paused for a moment, "I also think that you should think about talking to someone, it could really help and-" Riley cut her off before she could finish.

" A shrink? Hell. No. Not happening."

Erin decided not to push it for the time being. "Fine. We'll talk about it later. Now you have one more shot to tell me who gave you these." Erin said, holding up the orange prescription bottle.

Riley gave her a hard stare. "A friend. It's not like they're hard to get. I'm in private school, not a convent. "

Erin stared back at her. "One of your girlfriends rip them off from her mom?"

"No, can you just drop it?" Riley snipped back.

Erin gave her another long look, trying to put the pieces together in her head. "Matt gave them to you, didn't he?"

Riley didn't respond.

"Did he give them to you the night that-" Erin's mind started reeling.

"Oh my god no okay!? Matt didn't drug me or force me to have sex with him Erin! I WANTED to! I don't know why, but I did, "Riley tearfully screeched. "Right after my mom died I guess Blakely told him I was freaking out, so one night he gave me one and told me it would help. It did, and so I asked him if he could get more and bought them from him. All me, okay?"

Erin's wheels were still turning. "Where did he get them?"

"Seriously Erin, how the hell am I supposed to know? He isn't a drug dealer! He's a prep school quarterback who wears Vineyard Vines and has a beach house up in Michigan. Can you just let it go?" Riley sobbed.

"Shhh calm down sweetie, " Erin said enveloping Riley in a hug. Riley sobbed on Erin's shoulder. As her shirt became soaked with Riley's tears, Erin did her best to calm her cousin yet couldn't stop trying to piece together the new information she was gathering.

As Riley calmed down, Erin couldn't help but try to dig a little deeper.

"Sweetie, please don't take this the wrong way, but has Matt ever gotten….rough with you?" Erin knew she was probably pushing too much, but she couldn't help it.

"No" Riley replied evenly. Erin could tell the anti-anxiety drug was kicking in, and as unethical as it was, she was going to take advantage of Riley's calming demeanor.

"What about when he grabbed your arm at the game last night?" Erin asked lightly, also remembering the light bruising she had seen on Riley's ribcage last weekend.

"No, he'd never hurt me. He just has a temper. Savannah was in front of me, and he asked about her and Alex and when I said it was none of his business, he got annoyed said he needed to know if she was still talking to Alex, he goes to St. Leo's. I said no so he wouldn't be weird. But she totally is" Riley spilled.

"Why would he want to know about a guy she's seeing?" Erin pressed further.

"Who knows. He dropped it and didn't ask me about it the rest of the night, so I guess he figured it out. Matt knows everybody" A few stray tears were still falling from Riley's eyes. "Can we please stop talking about this? You know all my dirty little secrets now and I'm exhausted."

Riley put her head back on the pillow, but Erin noted how she stayed close to her side. As she closed her eyes, Erin wiped the last couple of tears off of her swollen, red cheeks.

As she was thinking about everything Riley had told her, she couldn't help but wonder if her younger cousin was more in over her head than she even know.


End file.
